Bernie Sanders

God Pt. 2

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Hey, you guys! Chuck here!

I would like to spend this beautiful First Sunday of Lent continuing my discussion on God and explaining what happens when you die! I’m aware of how absurd this proposal sounds! Why would anyone listen to what a street-performer has to say about what happens when you die? But, the way I see it, if a reality TV star can be the commander in chief of the world’s strongest military, then a street performer can tell you what happens when you die! I figure that I’m just as qualified as anyone to tell you what lies beyond the grave, and that is to say, that I’m not at all qualified! I call what I’m doing here entrepreneurial metaphysics, because I’m bringing the entrepreneurial spirit to the great questions that have plagued mankind since the dawn of time! There was a time when I assumed that certain industries were beyond the scope of the entrepreneurial spirit! But, then a reality TV star became the Leader of the Free World, and I realized that pretty much anything goes at this point!

In this post from a couple of weeks ago, I explained what God is. God is the giver of divine love. God created a vessel to fill with divine love. The vessel became ashamed because it had done nothing to earn God’s love. God warned the vessel that earning His/Her love would be very difficult, take a long time, and entail much suffering. The vessel was cool with that and God shattered it. And the purpose of life is to reassemble God’s creation and finally earn His/Her love. This is a concept of God which I’ve borrowed from Jewish mysticism. I think it’s the best explanation I’ve heard so far, so it’s the one I use, and I find it very practical.

What happens when you die is implied in this understanding of God and the meaning of life. Life has a purpose and we are here to do work! So, when you die, the universe puts you right back to work! When you die, you’re either not ready to receive God’s love, in which case you get reincarnated to continue to work on yourself, or you are ready and you realize that you’d rather stay behind and help those who aren’t, in which case you get reincarnated! Nobody gets out of this thing until everybody gets out of this thing! Just think of the most frustrating person in your life (for a lot of you, that’s probably the reality TV star)! You don’t get to go to Heaven until that guy does! I think Bernie Sanders said it best when he said “my spirituality is that we’re all in this together”. We are literally all in this together, there’s no one to hate. And we’ve got a lot of work to do! So, it’s very important that we’re happy, healthy, and high-energy!

I’ve borrowed this idea from Buddhism! In the Buddhist tradition there are what are called the Bodhisattva vows. One of those vows is the vow to liberate all beings. When a man or woman takes the Bodhisattva vows, they vow to prolong their own liberation until all sentient beings have attained liberation! When a Bodhisattva dies, they get reincarnated, and they get right back to work helping those of us who are still kind of bumbling around in our own confusion! Talk about high-energy and hardworking!

So that’s what happens when you die! You get right back to work! I’d like to remind you that this blog is intended for entertainment purposes and should not be used as a substitute for professional spiritual advice! If you have any serious questions about God or what happens when you die, consult a priest, rabbi, or guru or whatever! If you have any non-serious questions about God or what happens when you die, feel free to email me at Please keep in mind that I make no claim to be any kind of spiritual authority nor the recipient of any kind of revelation. What I’m doing here is simply an experiment in entrepreneurial metaphysics and I thank you for bearing with me through it!


A World Where Everyone Wears Chuck Taylors Pt. 2

Hey, you guys! Chuck here!

In my last post I discussed how 2016 was the best year of my life even though everyone else seemed to think it was pretty awful! I explained that this was due to the fact that I had rewired my brain to focus on more positive and useful things! I explained how what we focus on becomes our reality and I used this analogy; I wear Chuck Taylors, therefore I live in a world where everyone wears Chuck Taylors. I don’t literally live in a world where everyone wears Chuck Taylors, but because I wear Chuck Taylors my brain automatically focuses on people who do and creates for me a reality in which everyone wears Chuck Taylors. And just as my brain has been wired to focus on Chuck Taylors, I intentionally wired my brain to focus on positive and useful things.

At this point you may be thinking that maybe I just had a really good year. After all, I did quit drinking, I lost a lot of weight, and people gave me a lot of money! I had many successes! Maybe 2016 was the best year of my life because it objectively was! But, I would argue that 2016 could have just as easily been the worst year of my life if my brain had been wired to focus on negative and useless things!

I could have focused on the way the DNC robbed Bernie Sanders of his opportunity to be the President of the United States of America! That was definitely a bummer!

Back in June my impacted wisdom teeth had become infected to the point where I could no longer chew solid foods. It wouldn’t be until October that I was finally able to get them removed. That’s right! For four months I was unable to eat solid foods! My diet consisted of yogurt, oatmeal, smoothies, and tofu scrambles! I also suffered numerous, painful toothaches! And I often bit my cheeks when I talked!

And, when I did finally get my wisdom teeth removed, we discovered that my mild hemophilia wasn’t as mild as we had initially thought. When the bleeding didn’t stop, I had to be taken to the emergency room. I spent seven hours being poked with needles and pumped full of coagulants.

Bernie was robbed! No solid foods for four months! A seven hour trip to the ER! So many bad things in 2016! But, my brain had been wired to focus on positive and useful things! Each of these bad things became a learning opportunity. From Bernie, I learned that one high-energy person can change the hearts of millions of people! From my four months of not being able to eat solid foods, I learned that I’m capable of eating a much healthier diet than I had been my entire life! From my trip to the ER I learned that my hemophilia is something I should take seriously and I started wearing a medic-alert bracelet!

Rewire your brain to focus on positive and useful things and together we will have many successes in 2017! And if you have any questions or there’s something you would like to see me discuss on this blog, email me at my new high-energy email address